From the outside, they may look the same as others but from inside their lives, minds and hearts are vastly different. Single moms don’t have the same free will as other women. They are connected, interwoven with the lives of their children.
Bold and beautiful, Sushmita Sen, is a woman of grit and determination. She went against the established social norms and decided to be a single mother. There were challenges and long court battles. She, with her spunk, emerged victorious, to be a pioneer of women’s rights.
A few years ago, adoption was only for couples who could not have their own biological children. Sushmita Sen (single mom of two), being one of her kind, was the first and foremost of single women to apply for custody of a baby girl.
In an interview by Jessica Soho on her show Kapuso Mo, Jessica Soho, the charismatic and unabashedly candid Sushmita Sen admitted that she’d get married soon. She also spoke about her struggles of becoming a mother.
“Being a single mother is not easy. It’s very romantic, but it’s not easy. Yes, that is true (went to court for my first daughter). I was 24-years-old and I had been trying since I was 22 to become a mom by the process of adoption. In addition, they did not allow it. It took us a while and we got the custody for my baby,” she shared in her interview.
She was barely 24 when she brought home her first baby girl, Rene, meaning re-birth. Adopting the second girl was more difficult than the first one for her.
“But the second child was actually a bigger court fight than the first one. Because in India, the rules said that you could not adopt a daughter after a daughter. You have to adopt a son. Moreover, I wanted to adopt a daughter, so 10 years I fought and then my Alisah came. It was a long wait,” she shared.
She is unique. Her soul is far more beautiful than her body. A true lover of life, she celebrates everything that comes her way. It cannot be as romantic as she displays for a 40-year-old single mother of two girl-children. She wants to get married to the right person.
“I have been very attached, just not married. I don’t know, I think we’re all unique and we are somehow told by everyone else that this is the right age to get married. This is the right age to have children. This is the right age to retire. I just wanted to take life at my own clock because I believe everybody’s unique. I came close to marriage twice. But, better sense prevailed I think. I will get married and I think in due course of time, I think that too will happen,” she shared.
In one of her interviews, she shared what her father said to her, “Please look at my daughter. Do you think I’ve raised her in a way that her only identity is to be someone’s wife?”
Sen is an inspiration for many women and has taught out society a few lessons over the years.
- Teach daughters to believe in themselves: Just as Sushmita shared this wisdom with her own daughter Renee, we must also teach our girls to trust themselves and follow their dreams. It’s always too easy to give up, but it takes a fighter to strive.
- Age is just a number: Never push children to follow your unfulfilled dreams and never let them believe that age is an important factor in how one must live. This also includes letting them decide the age they feel is right to get married or to have children.
- Be courageous: Teach your daughters to have the courage to follow their dreams and pursue till they have achieved their goals.
Sushmita Sen is a living legend, fiercely powerful, brave, and unafraid. She is an inspiration for thousands of women. She is a living proof that women can be whatever they wish to be. She teaches our society, as a lesson that everybody is unique.
We are humans and not machines. Not everything has to go with the same clock. Get married in 20’s, have kids by 30, buy a house by 35 and the list goes on. Marry at 21, do not marry at all, have kids, adopt kids, or do not have them at all. Do what you believe is right and not what society wants you to believe.